Happy Holidays!

Dear Yourlifelifter Community Members, Happy holidays and joyous blessings of the season. Many thanks to all of you for your support in making our Yourlifelifter family a reality, and supporting our common mission of emotional healing, truth, compassion, respect, honor, and authentic love. You, we, your children are all worth it. Together we are making … Continue reading Happy Holidays!

Why Those Who Follow Narcissists Don’t Know Any Better?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Narcissism is now a world-wide pandemic.  Narcissists have infiltrated society for one primary reason. Their emotional food supply is abundant. And like any predatory animal, when the food supply is plentiful, the population of predators rise. And the world, I am sad to report, has accepted that it is perfectly fine for members of our species to prey … Continue reading Why Those Who Follow Narcissists Don’t Know Any Better?

Happy Holidays!

Dear Yourlifelifter Community Members, Happy holidays and joyous blessings of the season. Many thanks to all of you for your support in making our Yourlifelifter family a reality, and supporting our common mission of healing, truth, compassion, respect, honor, and authentic love. You, we, your children are all worth it. Together we are making the … Continue reading Happy Holidays!

Liars Liars Everywhere – How to Protect You and Your Children from Toxic Moochers

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter People lie to achieve a goal: “We lie if honesty won’t work,” says researcher Tim Levine. Well, lying is a very effective defense mechanism we humans use to, in a nutshell, get others to believe what we want and need them to believe to benefit ourselves. We all have different needs and compete … Continue reading Liars Liars Everywhere – How to Protect You and Your Children from Toxic Moochers

Corrupt Politics? Dysfunctional Family? No Difference. This is Why.

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Pathological narcissism is now a worldwide pandemic. Why? Because narcissists’ food supply of emotionally unhealthy people who are vulnerable to their manipulation tactics is abundant. And the population of predators always thrives when the food supply is good. Case in point. Now the FBI is warning people who are exposing crime in … Continue reading Corrupt Politics? Dysfunctional Family? No Difference. This is Why.

The World Needs to Heal and Take Its Power Back

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “The fabric woven by our forefathers that sustains our livelihood and supports our collective happiness and emotional and physical fitness is unraveling. The needle on the moral and ethical compass that supports them has been replaced with a pain- and fear- based one. So rather than use and improve the system that sustains and … Continue reading The World Needs to Heal and Take Its Power Back

Why are So Many Politicians Pathological Narcissists and What Can We Do About it?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter“Criminals, parasites, incompetents, and predators running for public office cannot announce to their targeted hosts and prey their true intent can they? What do they like all predatory and parasitic animals do? They use camouflage to mask their true intent. The truly evil members of the human race know what makes people of … Continue reading Why are So Many Politicians Pathological Narcissists and What Can We Do About it?

Why Understanding Personal Power is Fundamental to Healing for Abuse Survivors

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Personal power is a recurring theme in my life, in my Blog, Facebook Page and podcast show because it is our perception of our personal power that is fundamental to healing that is most damaged by childhood abuse, neglect, and invalidation. It is also an area that is frequently misunderstood. So I dug … Continue reading Why Understanding Personal Power is Fundamental to Healing for Abuse Survivors

Am I a Narcissist? – Being Narcissistic Versus Being a Narcissist

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter No doubt that narcissism is a hot topic with we all being such a self-centered lot on top of the pandemic of pathological narcissists wreaking havoc in government and even those posing as healers on social media to support their parasitic need for adulation even from the victims they victimized.  So we … Continue reading Am I a Narcissist? – Being Narcissistic Versus Being a Narcissist

Narcissists Exposed – How Narcissists Create Illusions to Fool Us

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “Narcissists bomb us with lies and irrational beliefs to skew our perceptions of our own (male or female) and others’ personal power and worth. They frequently surround themselves with a posse of low-character ‘flying monkeys’ who support them in the ‘lie bombing.’ They target the primary beliefs that trigger our fears and … Continue reading Narcissists Exposed – How Narcissists Create Illusions to Fool Us

My Thoughts on President’s Day: It’s Time for the World to Heal Its Pain

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “If you lack the values or the integrity of character on which the Constitution was founded, its value will have no meaning to you, but its power will.” Humans, all humans, are designed to be the happiest when we are acting on our free will and setting goals and working towards achieving them. In … Continue reading My Thoughts on President’s Day: It’s Time for the World to Heal Its Pain

Terrorism, Politics, and the Pandemic of World-Wide Narcissism

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “We are a world in crisis because we have not improved our wounded faulty thinking. Because we as a collective have not healed and have not effectively battled the ‘evil’ component of humanity and society who we continue to birth, promote, be exploited by, vote for in key decision-making positions, and allow … Continue reading Terrorism, Politics, and the Pandemic of World-Wide Narcissism

Useful Tips to Identify Toxic People in Your Life

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter I write frequently about the damage of narcissistic abuse in families and the pandemic of pathological narcissism across the world. I am also committed to help people not only heal from narcissistic abuse but also protect themselves from the immeasurable harm from toxic people, relationships, and environments. In fact, these lessons are pretty easy … Continue reading Useful Tips to Identify Toxic People in Your Life

How Living Alone and Being Single Build Emotional Health

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “Living alone kicks us into self-benefiting actions that build the personal stamina and skills, knowledge, and abilities that allow us to become resilient, self-sufficient and self-assured, self-reliant on ourselves to bring us joy, optimal health, and the relationships that nurture our soul. Living alone allows us to have ‘skin in the game’ of our lives and … Continue reading How Living Alone and Being Single Build Emotional Health

Why the Narcissist’s Leaving is a Blessing

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter I’d like to clarify a huge misperception related to relationships, narcissists, and abandonment that will help facilitate recovery for narcissistic abuse survivors. Now, any normal human being would think that if the person they love abandons them and leaves (for no obvious or apparent reason), then something is wrong with me not them. The normal human … Continue reading Why the Narcissist’s Leaving is a Blessing

Do Narcissists Target Other Narcissists?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Narcissists do not limit their targets to just nice people or empaths. In fact, they target anyone who is willing to provide them narcissistic supply regardless of the source. Remember that narcissism is on a continuum so the levels of severity in their depravity vary. Nevertheless, regardless of who is the worst or better narcissist or more … Continue reading Do Narcissists Target Other Narcissists?

How Much Do We Need to Know About Narcissism to Heal?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter The legitimate healers as well as influencers and authors, the real game changers on social media like Kristin Walker, Melanie Tonia Evans, Dr. Lynne Namka, Glynis Sherwood, Dr. Judith Orloff, Christine Louis de Canonville, Kim Saeed, etc. know that ours are not necessarily the most popular websites and Facebook pages. We understand … Continue reading How Much Do We Need to Know About Narcissism to Heal?

Facebook and the Power of Healing

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter As the owner and founder of Yourlifelifter, a healing page on Facebook and website that serve as “A Truth-Based Healing and Information Center for Narcissistic Abuse Survivors and Others Seeking Emotional Freedom,” I have witnessed first hand the miraculous healing power of social media.  Facebook and the World Wide Web have allowed me to provide … Continue reading Facebook and the Power of Healing

A “Dear John” Letter to a Narcissist

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter I am posting this letter I received with permission from the author that describes poignantly the pain experienced from narcissistic abuse as well as the power we all have to heal after narcissistic abuse! I would like to thank the author personally for trusting me with her heartfelt, gut-wrenching, beautiful, powerful and courageous words. … Continue reading A “Dear John” Letter to a Narcissist

Profound Lessons on Humanity and Healing after the United States Presidential Election

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter I am going to start this article with the following excerpts from the description of the mission and vision at the Yourlifelifter Facebook Page. You will see in a moment why. “Yourlifelifter is a specialized healing and information center for narcissistic abuse survivors and others seeking emotional freedom.” “Yourlifelifter was founded by Evelyn … Continue reading Profound Lessons on Humanity and Healing after the United States Presidential Election

What You Don’t Know About Dysfunctional Families, Pain-Based Thinking, and Intergenerational Abuse

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Bringing clarity to the root causes and sources of the family dysfunction will significantly help alleviate the self-blame and shame that abuse survivors experience and clear a path to healing and recovery. Dysfunctional abusive families are fueled by unhealed pain-based maladaptive thinking that has been passed on from generation to generation to generation. Most recently, epigenetic studies are exploring the factors that … Continue reading What You Don’t Know About Dysfunctional Families, Pain-Based Thinking, and Intergenerational Abuse

How Abusers Use Your Vulnerabilities Against You

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Maladaptive behaviors do not spontaneously develop. They are learned in childhood where we are growing rapidly and learning to become integrated functioning human beings. These vulnerabilities are the result of the legacy toxic shame that we are left with from years of betrayal from those who professed to love us and who were supposed to help … Continue reading How Abusers Use Your Vulnerabilities Against You

On Functional Medicine, Truth, and Healing from Abuse

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” ~ Albert Einstein Let’s look at traditional medicine and ask the same question that Doctor Phil frequently asks: “Is it working for you.” Well, it is very obviously not working for the patients who continue to suffer … Continue reading On Functional Medicine, Truth, and Healing from Abuse

What Causes Malignant Narcissism?

Well, the experts are not exactly sure and frequently argue the causes between nature and nurture. Some say genetic disposition. Some say abuse, specifically invalidation including neglect and coddling, the same things in actuality that damage children who go on to become abused adults and targets of narcissists. One thing for sure is that both the narcissists and their targets … Continue reading What Causes Malignant Narcissism?

Why Did I Get Involved with a Jerk and What Can I Do About It?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Reprinted from September 15, 2013 I have been puzzled for many years with the answers to these questions: “Why would any decent person get involved with a jerk, Why do bullies target certain people?” And “What do you do to prevent getting hooked up with these idiots in the future?” After researching for over 20 years, I … Continue reading Why Did I Get Involved with a Jerk and What Can I Do About It?

Power Imbalance in Abusive Relationships – Part 1

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter This is Part 1 in a two part series on power imbalance in abusive relationships, common misperceptions, causes and effects of power imbalance, and how to correct them. Part 2 discusses further the differences between aggression, power, and control in abusive relationships and how healing allows us to access and rely comfortably on our … Continue reading Power Imbalance in Abusive Relationships – Part 1

How Do We Heal and Mourn After the Loss of a Narcissist?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter “We, in essence, have to heal and grieve from multiple doses of betrayal and the accompanying toxic shame and self-loathing and exaggerated feelings of powerlessness.” Narcissistic abuse survivors are frequently told to “get over it and move on.” This is not only ridiculous and inappropriate, it is also impossible. Abuse victims have suffered … Continue reading How Do We Heal and Mourn After the Loss of a Narcissist?

Why Understanding the Differences Between Harm, Fear, and Real Danger is Fundamental to Your Healing and Well-Being

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter I write frequently about the differences between aggression and power.  I’d like to expand on this topic as it relates to harm, fear and danger a bit more because understanding this is critical to your healing We Believe Falsely that We are Defenseless After we are repeatedly harmed, our fear and other pain-based responses … Continue reading Why Understanding the Differences Between Harm, Fear, and Real Danger is Fundamental to Your Healing and Well-Being

Power Imbalance in Abusive Relationships – Part 2

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter This is Part 2 in a two part series on power imbalance in abusive relationships. Part 1 discusses misperceptions on the relationship between abusers and their victims and describes the predatory aspects of abuse and the not so obvious causes of power imbalance in abusive relationships. Part 2 discusses further the differences between aggression, … Continue reading Power Imbalance in Abusive Relationships – Part 2

Can Malignant Narcissism Be Cured?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Here’s the simple answer: No! Can narcissists have redeeming character traits? Intelligence? Of course they can. But they permanently lack the qualities we as humans need to build and sustain integrity of character and meaningful healthy relationships. Therapy can help narcissists put on the brakes if they go to therapy and the therapists are skilled in their … Continue reading Can Malignant Narcissism Be Cured?

Three Ways to Maintain Your Self-Preservation When Dealing With a Narcissist

The damage from narcissistic abuse is insipid and insidious and the emotional harm from it can be traumatizing. However, do not think for one second that you are defenseless or powerless to narcissists. Narcissists are energy vampires. They cannot generate their own power or energy. In fact, they in themselves are powerless. We fear them … Continue reading Three Ways to Maintain Your Self-Preservation When Dealing With a Narcissist

Am I The Narcissist?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter I hear frequently from readers who fear they are the narcissist and the one with the personality disorder. My answer? “Absolutely not!” This distorted thinking is a consequence of prolonged abuse that started in childhood and its traumatic impacts on your beliefs, self-worth, self-assurance, gauges of reasoning, and your abilities to trust … Continue reading Am I The Narcissist?

Why are Narcissists Self-Righteous and Manipulative?

Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter Have you noticed that the most toxic people have the biggest and the most fragile egos? Ever wondered why? They are part of the facade, the illusion of smoke and mirrors masking a core of deep-seated shame and self-loathing and powerlessness. They are crude covertly aggressive parasitic attempts at taking others’ power for selfish self-serving purposes by those … Continue reading Why are Narcissists Self-Righteous and Manipulative?