Are you a victim of narcissistic abuse? Continued abuse? Suffering from traumatic stress? Are in the middle of an emotional crisis brought on by a death, betrayal, illness or divorce or are just ready to heal because you have had enough? Are you unhappy, emotionally fatigued, and suffering from chronic emotional pain?
You will learn:
- The real origins of your chronic emotional pain and feelings of powerlessness
- The biggest obstacles that keep you in abusive relationships
- How to stop thinking like a victim
- What pain triggers are and how to identify them
- The difference between love and trauma addiction
- Exercises to strengthen your self-esteem, self-compassion and self-reliance
- How to not only heal but to thrive after recovery
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Read this glowing review from Dr. Patrick Gannon, PhD, Co-Founder of the ASCA (Adult Survivors of Childhood Abuse) Self-Help Recovery Program:
Take Your Power Back: Healing Lessons, Tips and Tools for Abuse Survivors is a practical and inspirational guide that focuses on key issues faced by adult survivors. Evelyn Ryan’s words of support and encouragement will be a source of emotional nourishment for adult survivors as they go through recovery. The book gets inside the emotional consequences of abuse. In particular, it shows how abuse impacts self-esteem and how survivors are inclined to unconsciously seek power-imbalanced relationships with narcissistic partners. The 7 Healing Lessons are cogently described dynamics tied to one’s past and the corrective thinking that is necessary for recovery. The focus on the ASCA Self-Help Program (Adult Survivors of Child Abuse) in the chapter on the Healing and Recovery Journey dovetails perfectly with the central message of this inspirational book: you can recover your authentic self by committing to make specific changes that are essential to life success but it will take hard work, persistence and most importantly, a COMMITMENT TO YOURSELF. I can see that survivors will want to read and re-read sections of this book for on-going support and inspiration – THE WORDS ARE THAT POWERFUL! Full of helpful lists, psychological insights and practical suggestions on how to take charge of one’s inner life to facilitate recovery, this book is an undiscovered gem!
Patrick Gannon, PhD
Co-Founder
ASCA Self-Help Recovery Program
Purchase Take Your Power Back here.
READ THIS EXCLUSIVE SNEAK PEEK OF THE BOOK!
THE ONLY PERSON YOU ARE HERE TO SERVE IS YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF.
The only person you are here to serve is your authentic self because when you do, your decisions and actions serve your legitimate emotional needs that you know you can rely on for your safety. All of life’s pieces then fall into place since the core of your being is truth based, authentically you.
Your self-compassion, self-esteem, self-worth, self-love, and self-respect will soar. You learn to sustain your emotional health with the emotionally nourishing rather than emotionally toxic beliefs. This is not selfish, as many of us, including me, were raised to believe. Rather, to the contrary, they are what the psychological community calls adaptive, emotionally healthy.
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In healing, we learn to become our authentic selves not ones seeking approval of our worth from others. Healing is a learning process. Through asking the right questions and seeking and finding the truthful answers in a safe and trusting environment, we learn to turn our compassion and courage inward to support shifts in our thinking that support long-term emotional health and happiness.
We learn to befriend ourselves (who we long ago abandoned) by first accepting our powerlessness, committing to our healing, challenging our thoughts, releasing our fears and shame, and then incrementally taking our power back as we uplift our thinking and discover and honor our real selves and our personal divinity.
In the healing process, we regain our self-trust, self-power, self-respect and self-esteem.
We learn, then, what our true value is to our selves. We learn to rely on and trust our internal emotional cues that have been recalibrated with our newly found personal truth, our core beliefs that serve US!!!
Oh, of course, we must get cues from our environment and from others who have our best interests at heart. We also become better able to discern those who do not. But we now can readily use those cues to gauge where we are and to recalibrate our internal truth-seeking filters based on our choices and their outcomes.
We learn, in healing:
- To accept ourselves warts and all as enough, perfect in our being without self-criticism and fault finding judgment,
- vitality, courage and self-respect,
- to think like winners, rather than settlers,
- to formulate opinions and values that are our own,
- to take informed risks and make decisions based on our own internal cues, emotions, and values that we trust and rely on to protect us,
- to take ourselves back, to re-own ourselves,
- to do what we want and need to do rather than what others expect of us,
- to care for ourselves and respect our and others’ personal rights and authorities,
- to use our compassion for our selves and others responsibly,
- to become resilient and bounce back quickly from setbacks and course correct when we need to.
So we learn who we really are and to love ourselves! We become fully integrated people of integrity whose thoughts, actions and beliefs, based in our self-defined truth, align.
Our healing allows us to be the best versions of ourselves we were intended to be. It is the best demonstration of self-love we could give ourselves.
And in that newfound truth, we thrive.
Yourlifelifter 
Is there somewhere I can send a money order to to order this book? I don’t have a bank account. I recently had to slap a restraining order on a former boyfriend who tried to force me to have sex with him, strangled me, said “I’m going to snap your neck”, and said something ending in “…kill your dog.” I need all the help I can get.
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Thank you so much, Cynthia …words of gold to me. And yes, I worked with men my entire working career in a male dominated field (still do) and am 58 years old…I well understand the obstacles…theirs not ours! They can only be ours if we make them ours but you cannot diminish the truth or true value…It is indestructable and undeniable regardless of others can handle it or not.
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Your words are gold back to me too, truth! I am dealing with an awful situation, trying to reclaim my unemployment benefits. I am almost broke, and my new good therapist is in Marin County, dealing with a sick husband. They went there to visit their daughter and then he became very ill.
I do believe I will win the unemployment fight, but it has been hell. My boss was an NP and did everything to make my life miserable, which was weird since I was a stellar employee. I threatened him I believe, since I was so much better than the other seven people under him, flying monkeys still acting like junior high, and he could not separate from them…king of the Muggles… He wanted to be liked, yet could not make them do their work…so he took it out on me…had to let them know who was boss.
I was interviewing for a move up, to a position with a female boss (whom he belittled, referring to her as the lesbos), and this made him livid. I believe he thought he was being exposed, since this woman knew well at hand that I was being bullied. I passed the first round of interviews and then I was fired, with no explanation.
It’s good to not be around such harassment but I need money. I’m glad I live near the beach. Thanks for listening.
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Hi Evelyn,
Thanks for writing this book. More than anything, your words convey the power of your own truth, and the undeniable compassion you have for those of us who are in pain and want to heal. These words are like balm to the wounds and assist in healing. So often we have not been validated, and knowing there is someone who understands, helps us to internalize such understanding, and thus gain new ground in self compassion. In my continued progress toward recovery, I will reread this book, do the exercises and affirmations, and recommend this to other people in need. You have helped me a lot already, and for that I am truly grateful.
P.S. I reviewed this on Amazon.
P.S.S. I would like to hire you for coaching, but I am out of work. Chicken and the egg. I work in a male dominated profession (software sales), and believe you might have some understanding of the waters I navigate.
I will update you here on my progress. Have a great day!
Kind Regards,
Cynthia Stacey
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I would be interested in your book
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