Evelyn Ryan, Yourlifelifter
I will tell you the secret to happiness and it won’t cost you a dime.
Here it is. TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE, ONCE YOU FIND IT AND UNDERSTAND YOU ARE WORTHY OF IT. You can eliminate pretty much all your self-doubt, worry, and angst by merely living in the moment and accepting that whatever happens, you will be able to deal with it.
Let’s break this down a bit.
After all, you were able to deal with whatever has happened in your life up to this point, right? It may not have been the greatest but you are here, right? Alive and well. Your personal power allowed that. Your divine design allowed you to do that. So in reality all previous angst and worry were for nothing and your fear was false. You anticipated danger when there wasn’t really any. But now you know even more than what you knew back then. So why would you not be able to deal with things better in the future if now you know better? Exactly. That is no secret, folks.
If we have angst, it is because we are fearful of repeating the same patterns, the patterns of the past that caused us pain. We are fearful of pain. We EXPECT there to be pain and the fear of that pain causes us angst about the future. We are born with only two fears – fear of falling and fear of loud noises. All, yes, all of our pain-based emotions (and the list is long) like shame, guilt, anxiety, grief, phobias, compulsions are learned, every darn last one of them. And just like we learned them we can unlearn them.
Read more here on how our emotions become toxic.
There are no “should haves,” “could haves,” or “would haves” in the world, folks, only WHAT IS. And “what is” is exactly what is going on at this very moment.
Got that? RIGHT AT THIS VERY MOMENT.
And there is a HUGE difference between a real rhino chasing us level of danger and fear of potential harm. Fear of harm and real danger are not synonymous. So, in essence, we overestimate the real danger AND underestimate our ability to deal with it. This causes us to suffer angst and to fear unnecessarily. We end up sabotaging our own happiness and and becoming inauthentic versions of ourselves.
However, what we know for sure is that we cannot take the same actions and expect a different outcome. We cannot, as Einstein said, solve problems at the same level of thinking that created them.
We need to merely unleash our personal power to do that. We ALL have this power. We do that by eliminating the obstacles that are blocking our personal power, the irrational beliefs and trauma bonds that cause us to doubt ourselves and our worth and thoughts that are causing us to scare ourselves to death and to stay addicted to our abusers and false beliefs.
When we know better and that we are worthy of the knowledge, we do better. This is called replacing lies with truth, your own personal truth and living an authentic life. And like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, we had the answer all the time.
I appreciate you & your book so much and thank you for helping us put a name and validation of our abuse. I am long out of my abusive marital relationships…but there are other narcissistic personality disordered people who can manipulate themselves into our lives if we are not educated and on guard. Thank you for educating us and sharing your story. May God bless your life abundantly through it!
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